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Wednesday 29 May 2013

Lucky Me Part Three

What I forgot to say is that there was a time limit on the bath. I was told that they would tell me when it was over. I was so comfortable and the water was still hot when Brendan knocked on the door to tell me that it was time to get out. A minute later he came back to say, "But don't open the door yourself. Just tell me when you are out and ready." A minute later he was back with his last instruction, "Uh, Mom, go ahead and get dressed." ......As if I would ruin the day by exposing this saggy 60 year old body to them!

So, being the obedient mom, I made myself get out of the lovely tub, got dressed and yelled down to them that I was ready. Brendan opened the door and escorted me downstairs. I was steered right to the front window where they were all looking out. "What are we looking at?" I queried. "You'll see" was the answer. Then I realized that their car was gone and so was Sean. Norah handed Avery to me and I made the mistake of putting my arm across his tummy. He had just been fed and  promptly vomited all down my track pants. I went to go upstairs to change into another pair of pants but I was rebuffed. "No, Mom you don't have time for that. You're going on a little pre dinner adventure and it's going to happen soon".

And then the car was there, but now it was festooned with balloons and streamers. Later I read the streamers said "60th party in progress".


There were lots of laughs as the driver/chauffeur emerged; it was Sean wearing a red sports jackets and a top hat. He put some plastic flowers on me, pinned a flashing 60 button on, we posed for some photos and then off I went in the car with Pat, Norah and Brendan. I protested that I should change my pants, find other shoes to wear, not my sandals or at least put on a jacket but no.."just go as you are Mom...it's just a little pre dinner drive."




So Pat, Norah, Brendan and I piled into the car. Once  seated, I was blindfolded and instructed not to even think about peeking or it would ruin the surprise. If I thought sitting in the tub and not knowing what would happen next was a strange feeling..... this was even more so. To sit there in the front seat, blindfolded and not have a clue where we were driving...that was weird to say the least. As we went along, with Beatles music playing, I was guessing..."I think we're on the Don Valley, this must be the Gardiner "etc. but then I got disoriented and had no clue.

Now my idea of a short pre dinner drive, might have been 10 or 15 minutes but this was longer than that. At one point we were stuck in traffic and I was assured that was not part of the plan. I expressed concern about Brendan getting to the the bus station on time and Norah said that she was honestly concered about getting Brendan to his destination on time.

I realized were driving west and at one point guessed that we were going to Brampton. "Mom what are we going to do there....stand there and stare at our old house?" (all three kids were born when we lived in that Brampton house for 9 years) I have a cousin and a friend who live in Oakville. Were we going there?

Finally, after perhaps 30 minutes, the car came to a stop and I was instructed to remove my blindfold.

"Where in hell?" I exclaimed.
"Where do you think we are Mom? "
"Are we at Pearson?"
"Yes, we are Mom," they laughed.
"Well who are we going to meet?"
" We're not meeting anyone.....you're going somewhere?
"I am?!"
"Yes, get out of the car Mom."
Now I couldn't move. I couldn't take it all in. "We're at the airport and I'm flying somewhere? Now? Dressed like this?"
"That's right Mom, now get out of the car."
" But I've got vomit all over my pants."
"Doesn't matter Mom, you're going. Dad you'd better tell her..."

We all got out of the car. It was still chilly and windy. I stood there in my thin shirt, no jacket, purse or cell phone and turned to Pat, "Where are we going?" I demanded.
He smiled and sang, "Leaving....."
"Las Vegas?" I guessed.
" Yes, we're going to Las Vegas!"
" You're going to see the Cirque de Soleil Love show Mom!"
" It's going to be 38 degrees there!"

I'm going where? Dressed like this?

I was....totally dumbfounded. I simply couldn't believe it. I had believed that we were on a little drive, that we would go somewhere, then drive Brendan to the bus station, then go back to Norah and Sean's place for pizza. The following day we would probably go to a bed and breakfast somewhere in southern Ontario. But this? Las Vegas? Right now?

The reason Norah had been concerned about the traffic jam was that Brendan was not taking the bus. He had a flight to catch, back to Ottawa, before we got ours to Vegas. So we said good bye to him and then to Norah and walked into the airport...me in a daze. Very slowly it all started to make sense. No wonder they couldn't have let me find my other shoes or change my pants. While I had been lying in the bathtub, they had sorted through my suitcase, decided on what was going and not going, then put my suitcase into the car.

So, that was my big surprise. For Mother's Day and my birthday, Pat had planned this trip to Las Vegas. Aaron, Norah and Brendan gave us tickets to the Love show on Monday night. Ever since I had heard about this show, in 2006, I have wanted to see it. I have enjoyed several Cirque shows but always wanted to see this one which is set to Beatles music.The only place it is performed is at the Mirage Hotel in Las Vegas.

Of course the main reason most people go to Vegas is to get lucky, to strike it rich, to come back a winner etc. However, I went there with the opposite feeling. I sat there in Pearson airport feeling like I was already the luckiest person ever. To have a husband and children who would remember that I wanted to see this show, who would organize it all and and take so much enjoyment from planning the surprise for me...Well there is certainly no amount of money that could ever come close to matching what I already have.




Friday 24 May 2013

Lucky Me Part Two

It was, as usual, fun to spend time with our little Avery. After not seeing him for a month, we were surprised at the changes, mostly his ability to turn over. On Sunday morning the weather turned very chilly. We stood at the corner of Yonge and Bloor and watched thousands of runners go by in the Sporting Life 10K. In that size of crowd we were lucky to spot Sean and Brendan.


After the race we all went out for  a delicious brunch. Right there I would have said it was a very good day. However, it was only starting.

During the afternoon Norah asked if I was getting excited about my upcoming surprise outing. Again few details were released. No, I was not leaving her house that night. We made plans to order pizza around 5 pm so Brendan could have a bite to eat before taking the bus back to Ottawa...now that we couldn't drive him back that night.

Around 4 pm Norah told me that my first surprise was going to happen in 10 minutes. She disappeared and then,  sure enough, I was soon ushered upstairs and told to take a bath! What a treat! Their bathroom is lovely...the tub is so long and comfortable. However, it wasn't just a bubble bath that awaited me. There were lit candles and magazines to read. Their Ipad was on the  vanity with 60's music setting the mood. Sean had mixed up a drink that sat on the edge of the tub.

Maybe a bubble bath sounds like a small thing but I loved it. Honestly I would have been satisfied if that alone was my present. It is such a treat to have someone do something that thoughtful for you. I sat there in that bubble bath with my drink and music, feeling very well loved.

Now while I was lying there, luxuriating in the hot bubbles, drinking my wine spritzer, I was aware that there was some scurrying going on. Very quietly there were movements, in the hallway, then on the stairs. If I was ambitious I could have speculated on what they were doing but I just relaxed. After all, there was nothing I could do...they were up to something and I might just as well go along with it. After all, this first surprise was lovely so I was off to a great start. And so, I lay there reading Real Simple.

Lying there in that bubble bath, I felt very well loved.



Thursday 23 May 2013

Lucky Me Part One

Just for the record...if you ever catch me complaining about my family...somebody stop me! I have always felt very lucky but especially now, after what they pulled off to celebrate Mother's Day and my upcoming 60th birthday.

The plan had been to go to Toronto for Mother's Day weekend, to celebrate Norah's first Mother's Day with her, Sean and prince Avery. In addition, Sean and Brendan were running in the Sporting Life 10K on Sunday morning. The proceeds of that race were going to help support Camp Oochigeas‎, where Norah works. We would drive down on Friday night and return Sunday afternoon. Then, out of the blue, a few days before we were to leave, Pat told me that we would not be returning to Ottawa until Thursday. We were going somewhere else for a few days. Nothing like this has ever happened. We always plan everything together so I was mystified for sure. He would not divulge any details. The only information I could glean from him was that I should pack one dressy outfit and maybe a bathing suit and a pair of shorts, in case the weather got warmer.

It was a strange feeling, to have Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday of the following week totally blank. I am a planner, an organizer, a compulsive list maker. I have daily lists, short term lists and long term lists. I have lists of house jobs, family jobs and writing jobs. I am such a bossy wife that I sometimes make lists for Pat as well as myself. Anyhow, it was strange to let go of those days, to cancel my previous commitments and just try to relax about the whole thing. Strange and at the same time, kind of liberating.

Okay so I did cheat a bit. Pat is not a great folder and so I, the bossy wife, decided to re-pack his suitcase, to refold his clothes. First of all, it was surprising to find that he was using a full sized suitcase and secondly, it had nothing but shorts and t shirts inside.  Where were we going? In the back of my head I thought I could go check the drawer where we kept the passports but I never got around to doing that. I did go back to my own suitcase and throw in a second pair of shorts. It was unusual, to say the least, to pack for a trip to an unknown destination. I was guessing that we were perhaps going to Stratford or perhaps Niagara on the Lake. Maybe the play season was starting and we were heading to a hotel with a pool and we'd see a play or two?

We set off for Toronto with no job lists...an empty slate!

Monday 20 May 2013

Happy Birthday Nanny


Oh Dear...How can I hope to establish any  faithful readers if I cannot maintain a  regular blog? So sorry for my absence .... I am turning over a new blog leaf...I will write more regularly!

Spoiler Alert!!!     Much of my writing on this blog will be the ramblings/reflections of my not so exciting life as a mom, grandma, community activist, political junkie, whatever....nothing too earth shattering on most days. However, last Sunday my world definitely got shaken up...in a good way. I will resist the temptation to write about that now. I had this post just about finished before that unexpected turn of events and besides that, today is my late grandmother's birthday, so I will post this Mothers Day item before I write about my family's big surprise!   (Okay so I am later than planned....my grandmother's birthday was on May 16th.) 



My mother with me...her first Mother's Day, 1954
(Written on Sunday, May 12th)
Well, it is a special Mothers Day for me this year because it is our daughter's first Mother's Day. Our little grandson is almost 8 months old. The whole journey has brought back so many memories and feelings that have been long buried. Quite simply... we had forgotten, both the joys and challenges of babies. We delight in everything that he does...his smiles, his sounds, his new ability to turn over, his joy in kicking his legs. What a life...to have so many adoring adults around you to record and celebrate your accomplishments!

And then there are the challenges. We had forgotten what an exhausting job this is...the 24/7 aspect of it all....the cleaning, feeding, caring, walking, laundry, rocking, reading, singing, carrying, worrying....all of it rewarded with his smiles.

It has been a joy, such a privilege, to be a part of this new life. Seeing our daughter and her husband  as parents and our sons as uncles...what a great job they are all doing in their new roles. The biggest change has been for our daughter, as she has been at home with him. We are so proud of her as she showers him with loving care and attention. He is a lucky boy.

I too am lucky. I still have my mother. Yesterday she and my Dad stopped by at our place and dropped off a lovely hanging flower basket. Every year on Mothers Day weekend they give each of their 4 daughters flowers. It is just one of so many special, caring traditions that they have maintained over the years. I can never list all the ways that my mother has cared for me..the list would be endless. She has always been so attentive to the needs of her 4 daughters and 2 sons. When we were young she would wake us up on school days, telling us that breakfast was almost ready, that our school uniforms were ready and our blouses ironed. She made our lunches, laced up our skates, tucked our snow pants into our boots, and typed  my university essays. She often picked us up from school, especially if the weather was rainy. On one particularly nasty day she set her own personal best with 17 kids in our station wagon!





Your truly, at 8 months, in the home we shared with my grandmother







It is such a cliche but of course, we really learn most by example and not by words. If I  have any notion of what it means to be a caring person, that comes from the constant, loving example of my parents. My mother had her own mother as a wonderful model of love in action. My grandmother, a widow, raised her three children and then helped out as much as she could with all the grandchildren. I lived the first 5 years of my life at her home. In the photo here, (from Christmas of 1959?) you'll see Nanny, standing on the right, probably serving us all...her three children and their families. She was very much loved by all of us. 






















Saturday 11 May 2013

Life's surprises

Sorry...I have not been a very consistent blogger...this longish story will give you some idea of what has been keeping me busy lately.

Did you ever have a moment when you thought, "How the heck did I get myself into this situation?" Well of course you have...that's life. For me, those kind of moments increased dramatically after having kids. I remember one drizzly Saturday morning, standing in a really big drainage pipe. It was about 9 am and there I was, a few streets over from our Brampton house. Our first born son,  probably two years old at the time, was happier than a pig in...At that point in his life he was a construction nut. We had a terrible time trying to keep him out of our tools. Bedtime reading favourites were construction books and the Canadian Tire catalogue. He loved to watch construction crews at work. On this particular Saturday morning, the crews weren't there so we were free to crawl in and out of the huge pipes, laid out along the street. That's when I had that thought..."How did I get myself into this? Is this my new life.....crawling around construction sites?"

Fast forward 30 years. We have lived in our current Ottawa home for 24 years. For years we have  dreamt of adding on a front porch but never got our act together. Last year on my birthday, that same "boy" told us that he was going to make that happen. He would organize the whole job, hire people as needed and do some of the work himself. It was just the push we needed.

We started about 6 weeks ago. Right now I am happy to say that I think the messiest stage is over..I'm talking about digging the 6 foot deep holes for the support posts. A lot of mud and clay ended up all over the lawn,  laneway,  tools, clothes and boots.

It's been a bit of a family effort so far. Certainly our eldest son has done the lion's share of the project....he is the brains behind the operation for sure. We are grateful to him and to his brother  who has also laboured for hours, digging and hammering. My husband and I have done our share as well. My duties have included many "mom" type jobs: making sure there is plenty of food and drink in the fridge, fetching tools, lowering measuring tapes out of upstairs windows to measure heights, and cleaning mud and clay off boots and tools. Sometimes I do real jobs like hammering joist hangers.

 Often I am the errand guy. As a matter of fact I must confess that last weekend I broke my personal  "Do not shop on Sundays" rule. We went to Home Depot at 7 pm. Our Saturday night date found us at Rona. Both places were wonderfully quiet and we were able to buy our lumber quickly. Apparently other people have real options for  Saturday and Sunday evenings.

So...back to my opening...my "what the heck ?! " moment. 

One day I was assigned the task of buying a piece of lumber. I think it was a 2 by 12 by 16...meaning it was 16 feet long. (I could get into a ramble about why our country is using half metric and half imperial measures but I will resist.)  I must confess to being a little bit nervous. I had driven the truck before, but not with a long piece of lumber sticking out of it. Anyhow, off I went to Home Depot and selected my wood, then rolled my cart to the cashier. This is no mean feat,  navigating the aisles while not attacking someone with your super long load. After I paid for the board I asked the cashier if she could have someone meet me at my vehicle to help load it. She said I could go ahead and he would meet me there. Then she hesitated..."What kind of vehicle ? How would he find me? Which end of the parking lot was I in?" I answered that I was in the contractors' area and probably the only gray haired woman driving a Ford F150. She agreed.

I have sometimes been accused of having a lead foot but not that day. Fortunately it was the middle of the day so the Queensway (highway 417) was not busy. I drove super carefully, especially when doing lane changes with my extra long load. It was with a sense of relief that I got off the Queensway and drove down our street.
 There's something about having achieved a goal that occasionally results in letting your guard down. I had been so careful all the way home but then I decided  to back the truck into our laneway....a very easy task compared to driving on the Queensway. If I backed in, then it would be easier to take the wood off the truck and add it to the lumber pile that was dominating the garage.

I thought it was all going fine until I heard a very loud bang. Much too late I realized that the garage door was closed. Somehow I had totally misjudged the length of the lumber and backed it straight into the garage door. Immediately I had company. Keith, our across the street neighbour and Mark, a friend  who was working, shovelling gravel for us that day...they both came running to see what the problem was.

Miraculously the door was still on its rollers. It was dented all over, but it still opened. Keith asked if we had a rubber mallet and ran to get his. Mark and I went into the garage and tried to assess the damage. Suddenly Keith was back and lowered the garage door. So there we were, the three of us, in the darkened garage. Keith set to work, banging away on the dents from inside. 

That was my moment....standing there with Keith and Mark.... I don't know either of them all that well and I felt badly for Mark. What do you do in a situation like that? Do you just stand there while this guy makes a hell of a racket, pounding away on a metal garage door, while you stand there with your friend's mom, the idiot who drove lumber into the door? Do you politely excuse yourself and say," I'd rather shovel gravel than spend this special time with you guys?"  Keith was on a mission. He had a door to repair but Mark and I were just standing there, in the dark, with the sound of clanging metal ringing in our ears. Anyhow I guess it was not that long...maybe 5 minutes.

I thanked Keith for his handiwork. Once he was finished you couldn't tell about the accident unless you took a good look.  Besides that, it still opens!